


Night Talk

by crazygreatwords (SamWithACrown)



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series), Thomas Sanders, Video Blogging RPF
Genre: First time posting on ao3 how does stuff work???, Gen, old writing bc i'm trying to post everything on ao3 too
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-21
Updated: 2018-07-21
Packaged: 2019-06-13 23:28:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 917
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15375771
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SamWithACrown/pseuds/crazygreatwords
Summary: Thomas can't sleep, so he calls out Virgil to talk.





	Night Talk

**Author's Note:**

> I was cleaning my document folder and this was there. I had no memory of it but since the timestamp says 4am I can see why. It’s from the end of August so right before Fitting In, lots of things have changed since then but I still like this so have it. Also lots of the headcanons I had are now outdated but still.

It’s 4 am. He can’t sleep.

“Virgil”

He doesn’t know why he called him of all people. He doesn’t hate the guy anymore, but having him around probably wouldn’t help much.

A short humming of acknowledgement let him know that the Side has heard him and has sunked up.

“I can’t sleep.”

He doesn’t know why he called him out, or why he says that. He realises he sounds a little like a small child calling for his parents.

“Yeah, we’ve noticed. Everything is still running up in your mind.”

He feels the bed shift slightly under the pression of the Side. Even if they don’t technically exist in the physical realm he can still feel their small influences on reality.

They sit in silence, and Thomas is comforted by the presence of Virgil sitting at the end of his bed.

“You used to have trouble sleeping when you were a child too.”

Thomas shift his position slightly, so that now he can see the Side. He’s not looking at him, but staring in front of him, remembering.

Thomas laughs softly: “Yeah, I used to think there was a monster under my bed. Mum had to check under it every night to make me feel safe.”

“My bad. Sorry.” Thomas can’t see his face, but he’s sure that Virgil is smiling.

“ _"My bad”_?“

"Yeah, well, Roman’s too. A little less, but still. An child with such creative side can only imagine monsters when it’s dark.”

“You’re saying it was Roman making me imagining things under my bed or into the closet?”

Thomas realises that he doesn’t know much about the Sides’ childhood. Did they had one? Had they always been there in his mind?

He asks his questions to Virgil.

“We’ve been here since we could remember, so I guess we were born with you? We just evolved as years went by. I guess we can say we grow up together.”

“How come that I started seeing you only now then?”

Virgil shrugs “I honestly have no idea. We’ll have to remember to ask Logan, he’ll surely have the answer or at least a theory.” He pauses a moment, thinking. “I think I heard him talking about being considered imaginary friends from kids? And when people grow up their Sides are so much part of them that they can’t externalise them.”

Thomas wondered aloud why he could then see them.

“Princy’s fault again, I guess. You’re a very creative person, so you had no problem visualizing us again.”

There was another bit of silence, as Thomas processed the informations he was just given.

Then he said: “I don’t remember you.”

Virgil looked at him, questioning.

“I don’t remember you four, from when I was little.” He clarifies.

Virgil smiles, and Thomas thinks that he looks a little sad.

“Most people forget their imaginary friends, I guess.”

A pause, and then: “Do you remember the monsters under the bed? How I said it was my fault?”

Thomas nods, but isn’t sure that Virgil saw him, in the dark room.

“Remember how I said we evolved with the passing of time?” Another nod “I used to be Fear, before becoming Anxiety.

"My job always was to keep you safe, to keep you aware of the dangers around you. I would take the shadows of your room and getting ideas from the creatures that Roman destroyed I would create monsters in every dark corner of the room. I didn’t know why, I only knew it was my job. The others weren’t fond of me back then neither. They said it was my fault that you didn’t slept enough, because of the monsters under the bed.

"My fault that you were timid, because I made you scared of people. My fault for everything, because back then our mind where the ones of a child, only black and white. Patton was the one who decided usually what was good and what was bad. But it was Roman that first decided that I had to be bad, had to be the villain because the heroes don’t cause monsters, they defeat them.

"Logan kinda agreed with him, because what I did didn’t seem logical to us at the time. I knew that that was my job, but Logan couldn’t understand why would I keep doing it if even I didn’t understand it.

"I think that was one of the first dilemmas that Patton had to face. On one hand, he loved all of us with all of himself, like he still loves basically everything. On the other hand, he could see why I was the "villain” of the story.

“So the three of them tried to keep me "down”, let’s say. Roman was the one incaricate to do it. He would destroy my monsters before they were even completed. He would keep me in my room when we were to meet other people or go out.

“I guess I had to become Anxiety because you stopped fearing things, thanks to Princy.”

Virgil stopped, realising only now how much he talked, how much he made himself vulnerable: “I’m sorry, I’m just rambling, I should probably let you sleep.”

Thomas started feeling the pressure at the end of his bed getting away, as Virgil tried to sink down.

“Virgil.”

The Side stopped for a second.

Thomas hesitated.

“Uh, thank you. For sharing this with me.”

Virgil looked at him. Then he quickly distorted the gaze.

“Thank you. For- for listening.” He quickly said, sinking down completely.

**Author's Note:**

> Non-betaed and not my first language, so please point out eventual mistakes.


End file.
